19 weeks into my pregnancy, it was confirmed that our son Myles had Trisomy 13, a chromosomal abnormality that’s considered “incompatible with life”.
We were told there was a high probability that I would miscarry at some point in my pregnancy. We were told I could possibly carry to term and then deliver a baby that wasn’t breathing at all. We were told there was really no way to know for sure how long Myles would live after delivery… it could be seconds, hours, weeks, months.
We were also told that we had the option to terminate the pregnancy “for medical reasons”. Jarrett & I both knew that termination wasn’t something we wanted to pursue. We are still so thankful that the doctors walking alongside us never questioned that choice; they never pushed us to change our minds. Myles’s story could’ve looked a lot different; but we knew that God’s plan for him was so much greater. We knew that this little boy’s life was meaningful and full of purpose, regardless of any diagnosis he’d been given.
On February 15, 2022, at just shy of 35 weeks, we met Myles Eden Logan. It was too soon—a lot sooner than were expecting. But we know that God wasn’t at all surprised by the timing of things. Everything about Myles’s birthday—down to the medical team that was there to take care of us—was perfectly orchestrated by God.
When Myles was born, he was blue, didn’t have much of a respiratory effort, and his heart rate was low. We knew this was a possibility, but it was pretty difficult to come to terms with in the moment. I felt hopeless; we needed more time. The respiratory therapist laid him on my chest, and the sweetest, smallest cry filled the room less than a minute later. His color improved, his heart rate came up, his breathing got better.
Myles would go on to live for 12 hours and 59 minutes; we soaked up every single second. We always say that no amount of time with him would’ve ever been enough, but we are so thankful that in that short time we got to hold him, introduce him to his grandparents and some of his aunts & uncles, read him a book, and fall in love with his little personality. He weighed less than 4 pounds, had 11 perfect fingers and 12 perfect toes, a head full of golden blonde hair, and—because of his cleft lip & palate—he had two teeth that had already erupted. He was precious, and he was such a fighter.
Our lives are forever changed because of Myles. It would be so easy to hear his story and feel saddened by it. It sounds painful, and trust me, there are times when it is. But we don’t want Myles’s life to be marked by sadness. He brought us immeasurable joy… from the moment we first found out I was pregnant. We know that we will continue to find joy in who he was and the miracle that was his life.
We now have twin girls, Lainey and Peyton, who turned one this year. They have brought such healing to our hearts, and we know that their big brother is so proud of them. We so wish Myles, Lainey and Peyton could grow up together, but we know for a fact that our girls will grow up knowing all about their brave big brother.
PAYING IT FORWARD
Abel Speaks has been such a blessing to us on our journey with Myles.
They wrapped their arms around us from the very beginning, even when we weren’t quite sure what we needed from them. They prayed for us, encouraged us and helped us find joy in a time of heartbreak and sorrow.
Seeing donations made to Abel Speaks in honor of Myles is beyond meaningful for us. Knowing that our son’s life is being celebrated in such an impactful way has been such a source of comfort for us.
Thank you for remembering him with us. By faith, Myles still speaks!
-Emily & Jarrett Logan